Mom decided that it's high time #2 starting helping around the house. She's 9. Hmmm, in dog years, that would be 63. Opps, got that backwards......she'd be less than a year and a half. Good thing mom did not come up with this idea when I was her age! Everyone knows pugs are lazy.
Her base pay is $4 a week. That would be about 4 Large Greenies, right? (Nomnomnom) Too bad I don't have opposable thumbs. I think I'm going to talk to my friend Salinger about his new start up. And she gets bonus pay for "Garbage Safari", though why they throw all that good stuff away is a huge mystery to me.
So #2's jobs are pretty simple: keep her room picked up, clear dishes, FEED US, and make sure there is enough toilet paper in each bathroom. She's called the "Toilet Paper Monitor." That's cuz she is too short for much else. We are a bit unclear about the need for this toilet paper stuff. I mean, what's wrong with wiggling your butt on the carpet? Plus, it's fun to pull off the roll. Humans sure are funny.
So here's what Mom saw the other day after the monitor was done with her rounds:
I call it the "Revenge of the Toilet Paper Monitor". Mom was sort of, well, annoyed. I don't think that's exactly what she had in mind.
11 hours ago